Go Ping Yourself - Jayvir Pillay

How am I supposed to breathe with no air?..Play on broken Strings?..Ride with no handle bars?..these are just some of man’s most perplexing mysteries that philosophers and philanthropists alike have shed many a brow of sweat over..But never has such travesty befallen mankind as marks this day..October 11- 2011..Since the extermination of the Jews and the African genocides has there not been such an outcry of human rights injustice as will live on etched in the memories of all…Let future generations never forget the inhumanity of today’s events and the efforts of all of those who gave their lives to make it right..the bone chills and yearns for warmth at the thought of verbalising such atrocities..but it must be done..for today
…BlackBerry service…was...OFFLINE…

Alas if only sarcasm were a font.The joys to be had. 

Looking out onto the social media landscape that is twitter and facebook, I was greeted this morning not by Bryce Lawrence hate slurs or a slowing trickle of how awesome Coldplay was, but rather the rising anarchy of BB troubles that makes Lord of the Flies read like a bed time story. Those of you who are familiar with my politics will know I’ve had qualms with blackberries and general disdain to false worship in media. I’ve skirted the topic of the messaging fruit, but after today the gloves come off, no more foreplay, planting the pole, sinking it in…etc..etc..

Let me just say that even though my views are jaded at times, I am nothing but an admirer of quality, of good business, and smart thinking. Hitler was arguably evil but you have to admire the man’s charisma. Akin to the Nazi’s I must stand back in admiration as to how Blackberry (PTY) LTD has managed to completely obliterate a mobile market share with an aged product that was given a shiny new case and repackaged as a glorified Mxit. Purveyors of Power Bands and that TV show How I met Your Mother (a poor man's Friends), I salute you..because not only have you been able to sell ice to Eskimos, but like a freshly ordained man of the cloth, you’ve put us consumers over a barrel and continue to have your way in plain sight. You threaten not to hurt mommy and daddy if we tell anyone, or make God cry, but expertly stroke us off one software update at a time.

But back to the matter in circulation. The reaction of the general populace to the BIS downtime was to be expected. But what I didn’t expect to see was just how less of the dominant species we really are. From the hysteria you would think that the Big Man himself had come down and reclaimed fire. Has our generation really reached a stage where something as asinine as a texting service,which we’ve lived without all our lives, has become so integral to existence that its absence renders insanity? It’s not for picking bones or finding issues where there need not be, but honestly when it all boils down to it, I'm just disappointed. I'm disappointed that as a human race whose advanced ourselves beyond single cell organisms, overcome wars and famine, faked moon landings, and found a way to squeeze out one more season of Prison Break, that we allow ourselves to descend to such frivolity.

Our youth proves time and time again the willingness to follow where others have lead, to use where others have invented, and lack exhibition of any independent or original thought for the sake of social acceptance. The widespread dispersal of IQ averages worries me not, nor do I propagate to be set apart or different from any other person, but it discourages the view of our days to come. The future of human interaction and the written word. Our peers of years gone by died for our rights and fought for cause and change. And yet all we find ourselves mustering is a gratuitous “like” on a UNICEF petition or giving up a BBM profile picture to a starving Ethiopian and tYp1ng lIk$ this…

Is it so important to keep that mono syllabic flow of communication with each other so close? Do we really crave any kind of contact so badly that we crumble without it? Is it of paramount importance that everyone has to see this picture I got forwarded of this cat..and its like really sad..and so he’s like “I hate mondays”..

Preaching of human rights violations and starving people is futile, and as futile as getting iPhone and Android users to see eye to eye. We just don’t give a shit.We know better, that we should do better, and care more about the bigger issues, but we just don’t give a shit. And why should we? We get everything we need from the comfort of our plastic and LCD wombs. From the safety of broadband and mobile service. From the haven of Edge and 3G so may we not be so alone in this world. A land where emoti-"con"s can substitute for real emotions and its all just one big RPG. Pity those World of Warcraft users if you will,but that online persona that we all project from the safety of wielding keypads for swords. That rivals even the most adventurous hobbit or elf.

Embrace technology and embrace change for resistance is futile and chivalry is dead. But lets try not to lose ourselves in the bullshit of it all and place so much value in tangible objects that we become lost without..

“There is something about yourself that you don't know. Something that you will deny even exists, until it's too late to do anything about it. It's the only reason you get up in the morning. The only reason you suffer the shitty boss, the blood, the sweat and the tears. This is because you want people to know how good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you really are. Fear or revere me, but please, think I'm special. We share an addiction. We're approval junkies. We're all in it for the slap on the back and the gold watch. The hip-hip-hoo-fuckin' rah. Look at the clever boy with the badge, polishing his trophy. Shine on you crazy diamond, because we're just monkeys wrapped in suits, begging for the approval of others”

Jake Green (Revolver)